Lately i feel like all i have blogged about is.. this wedding.. that wedding.. this person is engaged, that person is engaged.. blah blah blah. I am SOOO happy for all my friends that have gotten married. This post isn't about them. Its about ME. I came to quite a realization in the past few months that has made me think i am quite smart. :)
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sleepover on Stephs trampoline |
I feel like my whole life i have been looking forward to that 'next stage'. I was so excited to drive, then i was excited to graduate, then i was excited to move out, then i was excited for college soccer, then i was excited to graduate from college. And my startling discovery..... i am FINALLY perfectly content with where i am at in my life. I love going to school, i love working, and i love being single.
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Utes game.. 5th row baby! |
Lets address that last part.. single? I hate when people ask me that question. If you are a 20 year old girl and not married you are very familiar with it....Are you dating anyone? How do I answer that question? Technically i am not really dating anyone. BUT i do write someone every week? is that the same? i dunno. All i know is that i am loving the time of life i am at right now. I love the fact that i am in complete control of where my life is going, and no one has a say but ME. Selfish? maybe. But it has taught me so much about who i am, what i want, and even the things that i really truly enjoy. I love the fact that i am single. I have gotten to do so many cool things that i know, if i were married, i wouldn't have had the opportunity to accomplish.
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I love my African children |
That is not to say, that i NEVER want to get married. Every girl dreams of getting married someday. But for me, that day isnt now. And i am perfectly fine with that. In the wise words of John Mayer..
Nothing to do, Nowhere to be.
A simple little kind of free.
Nothing to do. No one but me.
And that's all i need...
I am perfectly lonely
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Family fishin trip |
And i know, technically i am not perfectly lonely. If i didn't have certain individuals, things would be very different. But as for me, here
in Sandy, i am perfectly lonely. ....
And this is not to say
There never comes a day
I'll take my chances and start again
And when I look behind
On all my younger times
I have to thank the wrongs that led me to a love so strong
...
I LOVE my life right now. It is full of so many challenges, decisions, and opportunities. Although sometimes it is hard.. it is SO exciting. I am fine with not being married. I am fine just living my life as a normal college student. Someday though.. i will be ready to be married.. but for now..
i'm good thanks :)
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Ironically.. driving to Brooke's wedding |