one week emotions

Technically, there is six days until the wedding. But since i havent gone to bed yet, we don't count that. we'll pretend like it's still 7. So many emotions have hit me in the past few days, and i feel like i need to blog them so i remember how it felt to know that i am getting married in a week. so here goes nothing.

Overwhelmed. I go through the temple tomorrow. I'll admit.. i cried a little when i realized that starting tomorrow there will be no more soccer shorts in my wardrobe. [i fully realize the blessings greatly outweigh the sacrifice].

Inadequate. Next thursday is the day that i have literally spent my whole life planning and preparing for. Being sealed for time and all eternity to my best friend, and receiving so many amazing blessings..suddenly i feel a little inadequate and unprepared. Plus, i think of my cute fiance and wonder how in the world i ever snagged him up. he is my everything.

Excited. HOLY CRAP....>>>I am going to be MRS AMMON ZITTING. Whaaaa?

Humbled. So many people have been so gracious with their time, money, and talents, just so my day will be perfect. I am sooo grateful. I wish i could be more like all of you.

Thankful. For my sweet Mother. She is out of town this week...[no cell service] and i feel sort of lost wrapping up last minute details with out her. She has kept me calm, collected, and happy, through this whole process.

Weird. I've been a little sad lately.. I realized that one of my best friends [you know the kind..the kind you can't imagine your wedding with out?] will not be attending because of a failed friendship. I always imagined my friend being there as a bridesmaid, and yet, here i stand heartbroken in a way, and a even a little bit bitter. Someday, hopefully soon, i will be ready for the forgiveness process. It's just a reallyyy weird feeling.. quite indescribable actually. Then throw in the fact that an ex texted me this week.. and man! weirdness alll around!

Relieved. That sweet Tiff Hafen came into my life. She calmed my worries when she agreed to shoot some bridal pics for me. I was notttt happy with my first batch of bridals, and well... she was a lifesaver.

Anxious. Anxious to get this thing done and over with. The 'to-do' list is annoyingly long, and quite frankly, i just do not care anymore!

Happy. Ammon and i took the night for ourselves. No wedding planning. No wedding 'talk'. No running errands. Instead we got snow cones at the best snow shack around.. "Cup o' Sno" and rented This Means War. We cuddled. We talked about life. We ignored everything around us. And for a few hours... i had a glimpse at what life is going to feel like. It is so easy to get wrapped up in wedding plans. I was honestly beginning to worry that Am and I wouldnt be able to hold a conversation after the wedding, because literally our whole life for the past 4 months has revolved around planning everything. I was trying to think of a recent conversation that didnt involve the wedding, and came up empty handed. SAD. haha. Tonight completely reassured me. Life is going to be utter bliss starting a week from today. Sure, there will be hard times. But i just can't wait to have that amazing man permanently by my side.